Is "nice" the new strategy for IT management success? While "tough love" has its place in the corporate pantheon, don't discount the impact of being nice, whether in the executive suite or the tech-support call center.

Make no mistake: "Nice" doesn't mean bland. "Nice is one of those words that has an image problem, it's kind of gotten a bad rap, because it gets used in a very careless way," says Robin Koval, president of advertising firm Kaplan Thaler Group and co-author of The Power of Nice: How To Conquer the Business World With Kindness. "People will say, 'Oh yes, he's nice,' which is shorthand for 'I don't have an opinion,' or 'I don't have anything nice to say.'"

Truly effective managers know that beyond offering a karma boost, being nice is expedient. "If you're nasty and aggressive you might get your way the first time, but you probably won't after that," says Koval. "It's part of the DNA."

Nice on the Rise

The ascendancy of a "nicer" work culture may stem from recent command-and-control fiascos."During this decade, there have been some high-profile failures to the old-school autocratic style, be they political - the Bush Administration and its failures in Iraq - or ethical - the downfall of Enron, Tyco," notes Tim Hiltabiddle, of consulting company Nice Guy Strategies in Newburyport, Mass. "Meanwhile, there are numerous ways in which we are becoming 'nicer' in the post-9/11 world."

The way we work today - matrixed organizations, distributed teams, mobile workers, telecommuting, knowledge sharing, and widespread collaboration - also reinforces the need to be nice. "You have to be a pretty creative person, and nice, to get people to continuously want to work for you, do things with you, and to put your agenda in front of someone else's," says Koval.

Furthermore, in our increasingly connected society we can be immediately accountable for any bad behavior, whether at work or on the town. Witness the creation of Web sites for blacklisting ill-behaved Match.com dates, or that online hall of business shame known as the "Bad Boss Contest."

Courting IT Talent

The realities of a tight job market especially require IT managers to play nice. According to a study by Robert Half Technology, 16 percent of companies anticipated hiring more IT professionals in the first quarter of 2007, and only 2 percent expected to reduce headcount - the largest net increase in hiring since the end of 2001.

"What does this hot job market mean for IT?" asks Samuel Bright in a recent Forrester Research report. "It's a seller's market," and to hire top talent, CIOs must realize that "the candidate's decision-making process takes into account culture, brand, advancement opportunity, technology profile, and business involvement, as well as compensation."

In other words, niceness matters. "Employees just aren't interested in being bullied," says Hiltabiddle.

At the same time, effective managers need to balance niceness with being a "tough guy," he says. "If you're too nice, you might become a passive, risk-adverse pushover with poor boundaries. But if you're too much the SOB, you'll likely lack the kindness, compassion, empathy, and emotional intelligence needed to be effective in today's world."

The Payoff

Beyond fostering better manager-employee interactions, being nice is especially important in support environments, both for IT personnel and their customers.

As an example, Koval cites a recent customer service experience. "We've been having terrible BlackBerry problems throughout our network, and I have to tell you the gentleman (in IT) I spoke to in Chicago the other day was the best part of my day." While he couldn't immediately solve her connectivity problem - IT was adding extra servers, and a complete fix was several days away - "he took 20 minutes to explain to me the problem in a non-technical way that even I could understand, and it made all the difference."

Furthermore, though she'd never spoken with him before, "I still remember his name -Trevor - and the next time I see his boss, who I do know, I'm going to mention this."

The lesson, Koval says, is that even when being nice takes more effort, it can pay off. "Business schools drum it out of us that nice guys can get ahead, we watch The Devil Wears Prada, we get all these messages that suggest nice isn't a success story," she observes. "But the truth is, people who are nice do succeed more than people who aren't."

Perhaps they just aren't as loud.